请选择 进入手机版 | 继续访问电脑版
设为首页收藏本站

一起SAT论坛

 找回密码
 立即注册

QQ登录

只需一步,快速开始

更多»
搜索
热搜: 活动 交友 discuz
查看: 64|回复: 1

作文-OG-P1214-Space Technology: A Critical Investment for Our Nation's Future

[复制链接]

1

主题

1

帖子

745

积分

付费学员

Rank: 3Rank: 3

积分
745
发表于 2018-8-21 12:51:37 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
The author primarily claims his point of view with several statements related to the importance of remaining the nation’s technological leadership position. He indicates multiple contributions of space technology such as keeping trade balance, bringing benefits to future generations.

Previous achievements of NASA are listed to contrast the “chronic underinvestment and applied research” of the current situation. The author portrays the former leadership in human space exploration that America owned in order to compare with current insufficiency on accomplishing space missions of NASA. Meanwhile, he appeals U.S.’s fierce demands of continued advances on space technology to remain its leadership.

Furthermore, the author emphasizes the benefits from the investments in aerospace technology to support his argument. The positive effects on biomedical field, army, computer system, daily equipments from the study of weather and navigational spacecraft are vouched by the author to persuade the preservation of NASA’s investment.

The author expresses the necessity of the space program for the future in addition. The sustained investment not only provides high-tech jobs for the future generations, but also keeps the U.S. ahead of any other nations, meanwhile will hopefully establish the basis of “humanity’s next great leap across the solar system”. However, it is shown that only if the federal investment is “at a funding level approaching 5 percents of NASA’s budget”, the program will have the greatest possibilities to succeed. The author is motivating his audience to preserve NASA’s program by using “well below”. He creates a tone which influences people by letting them think that it is a pity to throw away this program which will spend less time researching than other corporations do.

In the end, the author indicates the former challenges which NASA has already experienced to imply that NASA is also able to adopt its current crisis peacefully and creates new milestones. “NASA can do the same today” portrays the spirit of NASA people which is passed down from generation to generation.



回复

使用道具 举报

176

主题

337

帖子

1万

积分

管理员

Rank: 9Rank: 9Rank: 9

积分
11635
发表于 2018-8-21 17:37:46 | 显示全部楼层
The author primarily claims his point of view with several statements related to the importance of remaining the nation’s technological leadership position. He indicates multiple contributions of space technology such as keeping trade balance, bringing benefits to future generations.


Previous achievements of NASA are listed to contrast the “chronic underinvestment and applied research” of the current situation. The author portrays the former leadership in human space exploration that America owned in order to compare with current insufficiency on accomplishing space missions of NASA. Meanwhile, he appeals to the U.S.’s fierce demands of continued advances on space technology to remain its leadership.
分析不足,如果主题段落一要从contrast进行分析,还要阐明与主旨的关系以及如何影响读者。


Furthermore, the author emphasizes the benefits from the investments in aerospace technology to support his argument. The positive effects on biomedical field, army, computer system, daily equipments from the study of weather and navigational spacecraft are vouched by the author to persuade the preservation of NASA’s investment.
此段并没有分析文章,只是表明理解了重要细节,可以从reasoning文章脉络方面来概括benefits的作用。


The author expresses the necessity of the space program for the future in addition. The sustained investment not only provides high-tech jobs for the future generations, but also keeps the U.S. ahead of any other nations, meanwhile will hopefully establish the basis of “humanity’s next great leap across the solar system”. However, it is shown that only if the federal investment is “at a funding level approaching 5 percents of NASA’s budget”, the program will have the greatest possibilities to succeed. The author is motivating his audience to preserve NASA’s program by using “well below”. He creates a tone which influences people by letting them think that it is a pity to throw away this program which will spend less time researching than other corporations do.
主题段落三开头不知要从哪个角度分析,后面又转折引出数据,建议明确分析视角。


In the end, the author indicates the former challenges which NASA has already experienced to imply that NASA is also able to adopt its current crisis peacefully and creates new milestones. “NASA can do the same today” portrays the spirit of NASA people which is passed down from generation to generation.

首段要阐述分析的三个角度,比如证据有数据5%,权威机构证明,还有说服力方面有appeal to ethos,还有一些准确用词诸如transformative。然后主题段落依次详细论述三个角度。建议修改好再发过来。

阅读:3分;分析:2分;写作:3分

回复 支持 反对

使用道具 举报

您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 立即注册 一键登录: 更多»

本版积分规则

QQ|权利声明|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|一起SAT论坛 ( 闽ICP备16038975号  

GMT+8, 2018-9-26 05:44 , Processed in 0.186062 second(s), 30 queries .

Powered by Discuz! X3.2

© 2001-2013 Comsenz Inc.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表